Life takes sharp turns: Diagnosed with testicular cancer 1 month ago

This is the post I wrote at the time -- February 7, 2010

I was diagnosed with cancer on Tuesday.  Events have been like a slow motion movie on one hand and like a speeding train on the other.  I had spend much of Monday joking with people that I was scared that I had testicle cancer and had a swollen nut. It was swollen enough and uncomfortable enough to ask my wife to examine it and to call the doctor. When I spoke to the doctor and told him my age, and what was going on he said most likely it's an infection but let's fit you in tomorrow. Go have an ultrasound and I'll examine you. So I went and had an ultrasound.  I remember looking at the screen --and not really noticing anything odd or different. It was 4:50PM and the ultrasound technician seemed to want me to go to the urologist Erik Torgenson before 5PM. Which I did. We talked for a bit about Tom Robey's diagnosis and life....and then he started to examine me ....and pretty quickly told me I had testicle cancer and that I'd be operated on next Tuesday.  He told me to get dressed and come to his office. He drew a diagram that represented a decision tree -- I wasn't allowed to keep the paper because it was my order firm for surgery.

I remember being in the car and thinking how alone I felt. I called my parents and told them. My mother thought I was joking. I wasn't.

I went to my niece Lola's birth day party. 

I remember feeling my mortality as I drove over a hill. I could really die today. That's a scary thought. 

If I don't' die to day what should I do differently in my life?

I'll be posting to catch you up on the journey of the past month -- you should all know that the progrosis is very good. It helps reassure me through what is undoubtedly going to be a really shitty couple months!